


Hypnagogic

by spiralmaiden



Category: Neon Genesis Evangelion
Genre: 14 year timeskip, F/F, Pre-Relationship, Rebuild canon, apparently i'm supposed to warn for MP Evas, entry plug weirdness, looping references, mari deserves her own warning, mutual nicknames
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-09
Updated: 2013-11-09
Packaged: 2017-12-31 22:54:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,502
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1037343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spiralmaiden/pseuds/spiralmaiden
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Someone else was once in Asuka's Eva.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hypnagogic

**Author's Note:**

  * For [dryswallow](https://archiveofourown.org/users/dryswallow/gifts).



> My lovely Lauren-face. I'm sorry you're taking the full brunt of me trying too hard to be artsy. :D Also a huge thank you to enflashings for constantly putting up with my horrible first drafts and my fiancee for being my constant cheerleader even when a fic is making me want to die.

She unballs her fists but she doesn’t knock, not right away. Instead, Asuka stands outside Four-eyes’ quarters and makes sure she feels the ground beneath her feet.

She was supposed to report anything strange that happened to her to the proper people (being monitored was simply a fact of life for her now), but this particular thing was just between her and the other girl. No one else needed to hear what she had to say.

~

Her left eye itches, and when the LCL inside the plug hits her, it _burns_. She bites her lip and ignores the pain, even as some sense from that eye nags at her: someone else was once in her Eva. It’s like being able to smell another presence that had sat in this seat and gripped these controls.

It annoys Asuka every time she pilots now, especially since the owner of that presence can be heard over the comm, humming some saccharine melody that rattles against her nerves. It’s the same song from the bath last night and from their suit prep that morning. One of the many new constants in her life since the day she’d opened her eyes ( _eye_ , she corrected herself, as one of them had been firmly taped shut at the time) and was slowly lifted to sitting while an unfamiliar face smiled down at her.

“Oh, I thought about waking the sleeping princess with a kiss, but she opened her eyes on her own!” the bespectacled girl had said. “Well, let’s get you out of here. We aren’t going to let them do as they wish with you anymore.”

That Four-eyes came laden with secrets, including what they were testing today: the Eva’s second form. It was only natural that she would be in her unit as well, helping to oversee this test. Asuka, however, doesn’t feel like being babysat today, which she isn’t shy about mentioning over the comm.

“Well then,” says the other girl, completely unconcealed amusement changing the lilt of her every syllable, “I’ll leave the rest to you.”

“Damn right you will,” mutters Asuka. She doesn’t even take a breath _—_ she doesn’t need one _—_ before issuing the voice command. “Mode change, Code 777!”

The activation is like a punch to the gut. Her hands grip the controls convulsively and she yanks back on them as hard as she can. She’s never felt this out of control of her Eva, not even the first time. Somehow, it feels _good_.

Dimly, she hears Ibuki and Misato shouting over the comm but their words are lost in the roar of bubbling LCL and the sound of blood pounding through Asuka’s veins.

It was almost like how _he_ had been, back then.

At that thought, her left eye feels like its on fire and she grinds the heel of her left palm into it, just trying to get it to _stop_. The pressure causes colored spots to burst across her vision that all at once resolve into images behind her eyelid and she chokes in shock.

Great gleaming teeth in eyeless faces. It should be physically impossible for something that size to fly, yet their pinions block out the sun above her. They’re unlike anything she’s ever seen.

_It’s happening again._

She throws out a hand to ward them off. She can’t tell if the scream she hears is from her throat or from deep within her own mind, almost deafening the thoughts careening through her head.

 _She has to do this alone she_ CAN _do this alone but she must do it alone she is always alone_

 _Because_ he _never comes._

He’s right there in front of her, but not to fight alongside her or free her. No, his hands are wrapped around her throat and crushing, bending her head back as far as it will go.

_I’ll kill you._

She’s torn asunder again, by the eyeless faces, sometimes by his own hand. She claws and bites as she’s never been allowed before.

_I’llkillyou_

_I’llkillyouI’llkillyouI’llkillyou_

_I’LL KILL YOU!_

Everything goes dark and the echos of alarms ring in her ears.  Her Eva is frozen in place with Unit 08’s arms wrapped around its waist from behind. The test has been aborted.

~

In the darkness, all Asuka can do is breathe, and the LCL sloshes in and out of her lungs like restless waves on a shore. She feels like her heart has gone adrift inside her chest, her ribs the only thing keeping it from surfacing as it beats apart, separate from herself.

Something shifts in Asuka’s peripheral and, knowing how that could potentially end, she immediately tenses. But her left eye is finally quiet, and the limbs slipping around her from behind are surprisingly human.

“Who … how …” she says between breaths.

“Whoa there, Princess. Looks like your sync rate was just a little too high. But not to worry, I’ve got you.” Four-eyes’ voice is tinny, as though Asuka is still hearing her over the comm link, but the solid feel of a curvy body is at her back, plain as day. Her bones feel like anchors and she can only rest against the bizarre presence behind her and stare up into the darkness.

“Just who was it you were trying to kill, hm?”

Asuka goes to shout, but can only manage a cough around the rawness of her throat. She settles for hissing instead. “No one. Nothing.”

“If I had to guess, I’d say …” She pauses for unnecessary drama before delightedly trilling: “the puppy-boy!”

“Nope,” says Asuka.

But no matter what Asuka says, Four-eyes won’t be antagonized. “Guess you’ll probably need to see his face yourself before you can let go of it, huh.” she says. Asuka wonders if its her imagination, but she swears the presence’s arms tighten around her, pulling her closer. “But you know, if you try to keep killing things that aren’t there, you’ll never be able to control this.”

“Who would want to see his stupid face again!?”

“Hey, Princess,” Four-eyes says after a beat. “Wanna know something interesting about cats?”

“Do I have a choice?”

“Are you saying you’d rather just lay here quietly until they retrieve us?”

It irks Asuka that Four-eyes knows that isn’t the case, so she doesn’t dignify the question with a response.

“You know, in the wild, cats are solitary animals. And sure, they get along all right like that. But, do you know why they’re so prolific? I mean, they’re on every continent except Antarctica!”

 _You mean they were_ , thinks Asuka. “You aren’t going to let me not answer, are you.”

“Nope!”

She sighs. “Okay, why.”

“Because when cats were being domesticated, it became more beneficial for them to learn to tolerate each other in groups. In other words, they learned to band together for survival.”

Asuka arches in frustration. “Are you comparing me to some cat? Is that what you’re saying?”

The limbs release her, and Asuka's hand reflexively twitches behind her. She can feel it. She had been about to say, _don't let go, don't let go or I'll sink_. But she won't. She bites it back. The other girl's presence drifts to Asuka's front, molding against her. Hands press to her cheek and forehead and they're cool, much cooler than her own skin. They're _relief_.

“What I’m saying is that things won’t keep just repeating themselves, especially if you take even one step forward.” The hand on her brow is replaced with the presence’s forehead. “You may not be able to change everything, but sometimes just one thing being different will change something …”

After the barest of hesitations, lips brush against hers. It sends such an unfamiliar yet thrilling shiver through her body that Asuka parts her lips, inviting more. The first time is ill-fitting, but when it deepens, it's like surfacing and Asuka still needs to catch her breath. She doesn't even know if she's real, but she's real enough to grab and crush close, real enough to suck on, and she tastes like that terrible artificial tea she's always drinking. Everything Four-eyes left behind in the plug is right here in Asuka’s hands and she could get rid of her, but she’d rather keep kissing her.

There’s a sudden _whump!_ as the retrieval crew ejects the plug and when the hatch is opened and the LCL spills out, Asuka is wracked with annoyance to find she _had_ been alone in there the entire time.

~

When Asuka’s good and ready, she knocks. The door opens and a funny feeling flutters in her chest when she isn’t met with a smirk or smugness but a surprised, pleased smile forming around a piece of food sticking out of Four-eyes mouth. She doesn’t say anything, just steps aside to give Asuka plenty of room to come in, which she does not accept. Instead, Asuka gets in her face and puts a jabbing finger to Four-eyes’ chest.

“Stay out of my Eva,” she growls.

After a moment, laughter finally comes. Asuka flushes. But she doesn’t leave.


End file.
